How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
