Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
This is not my ceiling
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize