How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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