I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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