Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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