It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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