Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize