If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
