i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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