no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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