she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
