I like to think it a success when the cops are called
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
