You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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