I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Just puked most of my soul out..
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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