I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
