What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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