its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize