I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize
