No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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