How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
