Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
