Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize