woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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