she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
