Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
