IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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