May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
