I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Randomize
