The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
