You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
