i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
So much rum. So many feels.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize