god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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