The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
