This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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