I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
