Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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