How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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