And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize