hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
