..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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