Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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