i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
