I hope mine doesn't look like that
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
