I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
