Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
