i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
i've created a new STD.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
