it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
