I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
