i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize