I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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