I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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