nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
