So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
